The Weekender: October 26, 2024
The Weekender: October 26, 2024
Jokes, thoughts, and ideas from this week.
I have an opinion on the best kind of automatic hand dryer.
It’s the Dyson Airblade V, by the way. That sucker (blower?) really dries the hell out of my hands. The skin on those babies looks like the cheeks of a pilot when they’re testing the limits of how much g-force a human can experience. I love watching the little beads of water roll off my fingers and disappear into oblivion.
But this also makes me sad. It makes me sad because I can walk into a public restroom and look at the wall near the sink and it can change the way I feel about my experience in some restaurant (or movie theater, or grocery store, or wherever I am.) It also makes me sad to think about the decision fatigue that must go into designing any sort of place. I’ve started to notice how many different kinds of automatic hand dryers there are. Does the bathroom design person test them all? Do they have a deal with a company to always use their products? Why can’t we just have one of these things (obviously the Dyson Airblade V) everywhere we go?
Imagine being a competitor of Dyson and getting ragged on by your boss to come up with something to beat out their perfect product. Give it up. Focus on something else. Take the L and move on. Find your own perfection elsewhere. We’ll all be better for it.
Does anybody want to do their damn job?
In my most recent visit to the Dentist that dude had the nerve to ask me if I was keeping up with my brushing and flossing.
Uhhh, no, my guy. What do you think your job is? Why would I come here twice a year if I was just going to do your job for you when I was at home? Does that make any sense? This isn’t apple picking. I’m not going to pay you to do your job for you.
He told me if I didn’t start taking better care of my teeth and gums I’d regret it and he’d “have to do a lot of work in here.1”
Oh, sorry. I didn’t know that you were so opposed to doing your job. Maybe I’ll have to find a new Dentist. One who isn’t afraid to roll his sleeves up and get his hands dirty. And then put those dirty hands into my mouth to fix the teeth I refuse to clean on my own. If I wanted to clean teeth I would have went to Dentist school. But I didn’t. You did. Don’t cry about it now because you have to be a Dentist.
Don’t be a coward.
I’m looking at you, people who log movies on Letterboxd without a rating or review. Come on! What are you afraid of?
Let me know what you think about movies!
Maybe you work in the entertainment industry. Yeah. OK. So what. You’re allowed to have opinions. And if you can’t communicate those opinions in a way that won’t get you in trouble maybe you should rethink your choice of working in a creative field. Maybe you can get creative and find some ways to talk about art!
Look, I need this. I admit that it is completely selfish. My favorite thing about Letterboxd is finding out who, amongst my friends and acquaintances, has opinions about art that I can trust. Who thinks about things in interesting ways. I’m not going to judge you as a human being2 if I disagree with your opinions — but I’m also not going to ask you for notes on my pilot. You know what I mean?
“Here” being my mouth. He was fingering around inside of my mouth when he said “in here.”
Honestly? Yes, I am.